Megan Rapinoe’s career is over. Using the standards of fact-checking set by the McAllister Hinkle Group, we’ve determined that this story is 100 percent treue.

We were able to reach the original story’s author who confirmed that all of his sources are authentic and that he believes they’re sincere. “Especially Joe Barron,” he said, in reference to ESPN’s Program Director.

We also confirmed that Rapinoe won’t be joining the team there with the former star herself. “Yes,” she said, “it’s true that I won’t be going to ESPN.”

It looks like the old adage of “go woke go broke” may be working out exactly how one might expect for Megan Rapinoe.

Since we’re on the subject of Rapinoe, it’s probably a good idea to look into some of the other articles out there from the recent past. We can confirm that on top of this little setback, she was also dropped as a Nike spokesperson, removed from the Wheaties box, abandoned by the World Soccer Network, which may or may not exist in nature, and dropped by the OL Reign, US Olympic Team, and probably anywhere else she plays soccer.

So what’s next for the former striker? “I’m thinking of suing the guy who keeps writing this nonsense,” she told ALLOD Correspondent Cynthia Luhu, “he’s making the fictitious me look really bad.”

She’s not wrong. Pseudo-Megan has had a really rough week. It’s not exactly fair. But then again, she did go woke. So…God Bless America.

 

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