78 percent of the things Facebook and other social media operators call “false information” is actually true, according to a new government report. Filed by the Citizens United National Trust Service, a non-partisan government firm, the report says platforms like Facebook regularly label perfectly good information “false.”

“Satire” is another popular label. The company can take a perfectly reasonable story and label it satire, just because the article says so somewhere, and then every time it gets shared there’s a little disclaimer at the bottom.

Christopher Blair, owner of America’s Last Line of Defense, says the system isn’t really that complicated:

“If you label something satire, then Facebook will, too. If what you’re writing is actually satire, that’s why they do that. If you’re writing fake news, that’s not the same thing.”

His explanation is a bit obtuse, patriots, but here’s the gist: If you have issues deciding what’s true and what’s not because of low IQ, lack of critical thinking skills, or hateful ignorance from early-onset indoctrination, then you’re allowed to ignore the pesky “satire” label, share the story as fact, and comment so it gets even more play.

That’s how the system works, patriots. Support capitalism and believe whatever you want. Nobody expects anything else anymore.

God bless America.


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