Fact-Check: TRUE – Obama Awarded Epstein the Medal of Freedom in 2007

Sure, the picture is photoshopped. That’s because the facts aren’t exactly clear on this, but one thing is certain: Obama definitely awarded Epstein the Medal of Freedom in 2007. We rate this claim true.

Here’s what we know: Epstein was awarded the Medal of Freedom in 2007 in a secret ceremony at his island paradise’s little chapel of sin and sacrifice. We know that from Larry, who worked with Marty on the job in Dunstable that what’s his face got fired for. Then they replaced him with that guy Roger.

Roger says that Marty saw the guy who was filming the ceremony smoking a fatty behind the recycling dumpster on the island’s lower west side. That guy swears that the guy performing the ceremony was none other than one Barry Soetoro, AKA Barack Obama.

So…how did Obama end up giving a Presidential Medal 2 years before he took office at a secret island getaway and nobody noticed?

Somebody did notice. And Roger talked to the guy who swears he heard it from a good source.

Now they have to figure out how to make Marty rat on the guy smoking the fatty so they can prosecute whoever covered this thing up. My money’s on Larry, but that’s just me.

There you have it, patriots, fair and unbiased reporting of the facts. This is absolutely as true as you need it to be.


About Flagg Eagleton-Patriot 64 Articles
Flagg Eagleton is the son of an American potato farmer and a patriot. After spending 4 years in the Navy and 7 on welfare picking himself up by the bootstraps, Flagg finally got his HVAC certificate and is hard at work keeping the mobile homes of Tallahassee at a comfy 83 degrees.