Canada has decided that it wants to cheat at women’s sports.

In an unprecedented decision, Prime Minister Justin Trudeau issued an invitation to American swimmer and biological male, Lia Thomas.

“We respect your right to compete,” said Trudeau, “and we welcome you with open arms.” Thomas hasn’t responded to the invite, but she did tell her closest friends that she was probably gonna go, according to sources close to the athlete.

The offer is currently on the table while the story spreads like wildfire through conservative circles with many calling for Trudeau’s impeachment.

“From what I hear,” said ALLOD correspondent Skip Tetheludah, “Thomas told a friend that there was nothing ‘she’ would rather do than swim for the Canadians. While we can’t verify the source for our own safety, we can also not verify the offer from Trudeau.”

Skip’s report was a bit troubling at first, but then we remembered the audience and decided that it was good editorial judgment to run with the story. According to other sources that may or may not actually exist, our editorial standards are beyond reproach.

Trudeau has obviously brought this on himself and deserves whatever fictional punishment we deliver on him. God Bless America.

 

Comments

No comments yet. Why don’t you start the discussion?

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *