Elon Musk isn’t someone to be trifled with. He’s the richest man in the world, which makes him extremely powerful by default. So when he heard that the account posting his plane’s exact location was buying the data from a shady company in Des Moines, he bought it. Then he fired everyone and liquidated its assets like it never existed at all.

That’s the claim currently making the rounds on social media, and we rate it absolutely true.

The board of directors at We Track Planes LLC and its owner, Joe Barron, went belly-up when they thought they had the deal of a lifetime. Musk used insider information and shell companies to lure the unwitting team into a deal that hinged on the sale of the operation’s buildings and equipment.

“I bought it all from myself for a dollar,” said Musk, “then I fired the board and turned off the tracking devices. Done.”

We verified the story with the original journalisticator and found that he was truthful as he possibly could be and that he’s a stand-up guy who typically writes nonsense but this time we trust him. He’s also hot by dad-bod standards.

People need to learn that Elon musk can do whatever he wants. He’s like Trump but with actual money. Let that sink in.

God bless America.


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