The Claim – Disney is doing great, the parks are full, and the company enjoys record profits

Claimed by: Joe Barron, Disney CEO

We rate this claim: FALSE!


Disney is absolutely not doing great, patriots. It’s a failing entity and they’re lying to stockholders. That’s the story as discovered by integritiful journalisticator Flagg Eagleton, who only reports what matters. Obviously, Disney has zero credibility at all. Eagleton says the company is lying about its profits, attendance, and streaming subscriptions. Therefore, the silly claim is definitely false.

We can further declare that Disney does, in fact, offer a 20% discount to anyone willing to have their child sit through its new “gender discovery” program at the Magic Kingdom. Open to kids aged 3-7, Mickey and Minnie take the little ones on a journey to find their inner “other self.” The two iconic characters then change clothes and perform a pagan and possibly Satanic ritual.

So yeah, we’re gonna go ahead and say people are leaving. How many goat leggings does a kid need to see before he starts to think he’s a she? Ask Jowe Friday.

It’s a disturbing development for sure, patriots, but it’s the truth. Or wait…it’s not the truth, because we rated this one false. Sometimes things in the journalistic world get confusing, patriots, but at least we still have America.

God bless it.



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