Don Lemon’s big mouth has him in trouble again, this time with the women. His remarks about when a woman is in her prime went over very poorly with the panel, and since, most of the double-x chromosomes in the office wanted him gone.

“This isn’t a place where you want to piss off the ladies,” said Programming Director Joe Barron, “They tend to get pretty emotional about it. We keep pain relief and de-bloating agents available at all times but sometimes, someone like Don just gets to them.”

Barron went on to explain that Lemon, whose remarks are definitely unforgivable, has filed for a reprieve from the women’s complaints because he’s black. “I think they’re singling me out,” he told ABC while searching for a new job, “I think it’s pretty clearly a racist thing.”

The suspension will begin as soon as Lemon logs out of CNN and agrees to its terms of service. He won’t be able to participate, like, comment, or share anything that happens on the network for the full period of the penalty.

“It’s necessary.” said Barron, “Because of the Covid-19 pandemic, fewer people are available to review reports. We’re definitely gonna use the information we gather to improve future versions of the company.”

That sounds very promising. Hopefully, they’ll decide he wasn’t worth it when the ratings go up because he’s gone. God bless America.



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